Life, as easy or difficult it can be, is unpredictable. We were given an opportunity and had been trying to grab it. And now we have it, we may be wondering that something is still not right sooner or later.
I have been working abroad for almost two years and yet, I have never gone back home. It’s true I’ve been missing everyone I left behind, but I’m just doing it for the best. Going back is something that I’m looking forward and at the same time, I ‘m dreading. I just feel so uncertain what comes ahead of me.
I feel spaced out in class these days. I couldn’t help it. Perhaps time, people and environment have changed. I’ve been longing to see people from the past and to be with them. I am trying to reach out to everyone though, but what I am feeling right now isn’t the same as before. Somehow, I’ve been putting much effort in my classes as a teacher because I believe that I’m not working as a volunteer anymore and that I’m being paid. I’m in good health though I only experienced having a cold for a short period of time. I need to be as professional as I can be. It can be said that I’m workaholic. I also deserve to be on a holiday, to be away from my workplace. But on the other side, there are things to consider and to be flexible in whatever circumstances within my work. I have to save money for my younger brothers’ education as well. So, it’s a struggle for me. I’m just stuck between work and home, promises and desires…
Confusion is good. Same goes too with doubt. We might think we can plan a definite future, but it’s not like that. After all, future is always uncertain. As we grow older, we realize that accepting the uncertain path is a sign of maturity.